Coffee with a Lift a Nation on the Rise

There has been a long time joke about Viagra in Coffee (i have posted it further along) but I don't think that anyone thought that this madcap idea might become a reality.

Authorities in Malaysia have been working overtime in the early part of July 2009 to recall in excess of nine brands of coffee. All had been 'polluted' with Sildenafil which is the active ingredient of Viagra. As many as three brands had also Tadalafil, the agtive ingredient of Cialis as well. These drugs are the most commonly used to treat sexual dysfunction although under the counter sales contribute to the 'party pill' and 'weekend pill' market.

All the coffee, in sachets had been widely distributed nationwide but quickly 900 boxes containing 9000 sachets were recovered.

An elderly woman goes to the doctor for a routine checkup.

She says, "Doctor, I'm worried, I haven't had sex for years now, I miss it and I was wondering how I can increase my husband's sex drive."

The doctor asks, "Have you tried to give him Viagra?"

The lady frowns. "Doctor, I can't even get him to take an aspirin when he has a headache."

The doctor says, "Crush the Viagra tablet into a powder. When you are giving him his coffee, stir it in. He won't taste a thing."

Weeks later the old lady returns. The doctor asks, "How did it go?"

"Terrible, doctor, terrible. I did as you said, and he got up and ripped his clothes off right there. We made mad love on the table, and it was the most fantastic sex I've had in 25 years."

"Then what is the problem?"

"Well," she says. "I won't ever be able to show my face in Starbucks again."

This was no accidental pollution but a deliberate profit motivated commercial venture with the coffee distributed in such a way as to avoid detection. It was then advertised as 'good for men'. Although Viagra and its clones are not illegal in Malaysia, they do require a prescription so the coffee product was illegal.

I can imagine that someone waking in the morning and wanting a coffee before work. They may well not get there till late. It will be of interest to see if nine months from the start of July 2009 if there is a peak in the number of births in Malaysia.

Aphrodisiacs and coffee in Asia are not strange bedfellows. In Bali, 'Coffee Luwak' (Kopi Luwak) is reputed to have strong sexual revival powers. It is, not unnaturally one of the more expensive coffees. The coffee beans used in the production of Kopi Luwak are collected from the dung of Asian Civet Cats Paradoxurus hermaphroditus and Vivera zibetha. The Civets are reputed to be very particular about the fruit they eat on the coffee bushes. They select only the very best berries.

Coffee Luwak is actually quite tasty. I drank a couple of cups with a Night Butterfly I met in Bali. It made for a pleasant evening.